Tonight I ponder.
I ponder my choices.
How have they impacted the course of my life?
...my children's lives?
I ponder my ability.
Who I am.
Am I who I want to be?
Tonight we were out of sync
I know it is inevitable.
I know there are days where someone else gets all the smiles.
Someone else gets all the giggles while I come home and I get the tired frustration.
The ultimate melt down.
The tears.
Despite knowing its inevitable, it still saddens me ...
to my core.
which makes me ponder....who am I really? Who are you really when no one is watching?
Even a happy life cannot be without a measure of darkness, and the word 'happy' would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness. -Carl Jung
2 comments:
I had a wise-wise friend told me this today....
Finish each day and be done with it. You have done what you could; some blunders and absurdities have crept in; forget them as soon as you can. Tomorrow is a new day; you shall begin it serenely and with too high a spirit to be encumbered with your old nonsense. ~Ralph Waldo Emerson
I have to agree with Brenda. Even thou I get to stay home during the day with the girls the evenings also end in the tears, the madness, the yelling and no more patience from everyine and that sadness me also. I have to take myself back to how our parents did it raising 4 kids both working fulltime, dad being a truck driver and gone a week or so at a time, dad working nights and mom just handling us crappy fighting kids, homework and keeping a home together because I know we didn't care to do it. I would say that we have turned out really good and appreicate our parents for what they did!!!! The one thing I will alway remember about growing up and the madness is no matter how bad things were mom was always yelling every monring "Good Morning little miss sunshine" to wake us up with a smile with breakfast on the table.
Now might be crazy but there will be a time when our kids will hopefully think the samething. We are strong!!!!!
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