and the walls....

Sometimes as a mom/wife/supervisor/fill in every other role...it feels like I am propping up four walls that are crumbling down so you use a foot to brace one and another starts so you use an arm to prop that one and before you know it you are using everything you got just to hold the walls up, so you got nothing left to actually fix the wall, so you just keep finding ways to brace and prop the crumbling ones......

Am I alone here?

A few things work (logistical and administrative types of things) and non work converged simultaneously (each alone manageable, simultaneously not so much)

So my first coping mechanism was....shut down. Left. Bought some new jeans.

My second coping mechanism was....denial.

Currently I am using the method of self talk. I can do this. Sure. It won't be perfect but it's do-able. right? yeah sure.   BUT some doubt is settling in......

As I am driving to a late appointment tonight I say to myself "I wish I could call the radio station and request a little Pink, So what and I chuckled to myself thinking about calling the radio station! Anyways

I have a rough draft/sketchy plan of attack for work....not so much for the other/not work, still in denial on that one. I am not sure how many plans of attack one person can create at a time but I think I maxed it for now anyways!

After a lengthy conversation with a coworker I was driving home flipping between

"I can do this"

and

"There's no way"

and all of sudden........SO WHAT I AM ROCK STAR, I got MY ROCK MOVES!

Are you kidding me?!

Is this happening?!

It was on the radio.

I am interpreting this as a sign. 

I may not know how,

but I am going to trust in, in the faith that good things do happen

and in, well, I guess trust in me.

I can do this.

I'm still a rock star

I got my rock moves.

and I don't need you!