The magic is in the mess

Just a reminder that we are not alone in the mess.

'Every year as I think about my own life and reflect upon what my family and what many of the people around me are going through this Christmas, it’s clear that struggle doesn’t take off for the holidays.

The gremlins don’t go on vacation. Checks bounce, chemotherapy appointments are scheduled, interventions are planned, relationships keep unravelling, being alone feels even lonelier, parents negotiate who will have the kids on Christmas morning, and the “never enoughs” are in full swing.

As I prepare to spend the next few days with my family and friends I come back to this: I will find my holiday magic in the mess. I will practice love and gratitude with the special group of folks who keep showing up and loving me, not despite my vulnerabilities, but because of them.' -Brene Brown

 I will find my holiday magic in the mess. I will practice love and gratitude with the special group of folks who keep showing up and loving me, not despite my vulnerabilities, but because of them.' 

That.

That has been my motto this holiday Christmas Season. 

Try to be present. 

Practice love and gratitude. 

Find those that see your vulnerabilities and show up anyways. 

Seems nice on paper.

Much harder in practice. 

There will never be enough time,

or enough money

but love. 

We got that covered. 

Christmas Magic.

I am the first person to raise my hand for some of that,

but its a funny thing Christmas Magic,

it can be hard to find

and even harder to see

unless you really believe.

It takes effort to find it.

See it.

Make it.

yes indeed I will find my holiday magic in the mess.

The pictures they capture the magic.

Not the mess. 

Work late, Last minute shopping, no groceries,

giant to-do list, hence the Styrofoam bar take out, mess that we call every day life around here.

We all have worries.

Stress.

Things to do.

Vulnerabilities. 

Those don't go away just because it is Christmas. 

I don't want my kids to ever think that Magic just happens,

because it never will.

Real life just  happens. 

Being able to stop and make magic.

that's the true gift here. 

 Before you ask, Yes that is his real hand. Yup.

....but as discussed with Cohen today, Magic has two sides. 

Sometimes people forget...

Of course there is that side we all know,

the "wow" side,

The "HOW?!" Side,

but did you know there is a 2nd side of magic?

There is!

The other side of magic is making it happen,

It's gets far less attention that is for sure but 

I promised...

that doesn't make it any less magical. 

Welcome to the other side of magic.

We are going to have so much fun!

Merry Christmas! 

Don't let FOMO kill your MOJO

My kids are growing up.

Some days I can feel time slipping away. 

Like, tangibly feel it. 

No school today for the kids, prompted me to knock off work at noon. 

We were craving sun light and *maybe* just a little fun.

The kind of fun that makes time stand still (at least for a moment)

I threw around the idea of the pumpkin patch, maybe a movie,

If we did a pumpkin patch,

would we go for the gusto, otherwise known as Vala's or

in usual fashion hit a knock off?

I was leaning toward Hoop-la to be honest! 

After all in not so long...my kids won't care to do the pumpkin patch anymore.

*insert tragically sad face

Thankfully a last min meeting came up at work, 

which resulted in car pooling.

Car pooling thankfully with the co-workers I am blessed with

results in chatter.

Sometimes deep, though provoking.

Sometimes shallow.

Sometimes surface level.

Today...casual and free flowing.

During that drive I said 

"Am I looking for hoopla? Is it the hoopla that matters or is it the experience?"

Initially it was an honest question but quickly I knew the answer.

So the "knock off" was it!

It took a solid 90 seconds for confirmation I'd made the right choice!

At the front gate....Megan! 

(my college roommate and dearest, best friend ever)

On a field trip from their new home and school in Brady! 

You can't make this shit up people.

Coincidence?

Perhaps.

...but no.

No such thing people. 

Look around.

Find them in your life!

We fully dove into the rest of the day.

I was a bit worried that I would feel like we missed something....

something bigger,

grander,

better, 

by not going with "hoopla"

Like we missed out.

I hate that feeling.

Now.

Now I fear we would have missed something....

something bigger,...

grander,....

better....

if we had gone with hoopla

 Do you know how long we played in the corn?

Me neither.

That my friends is....

letting go. 

 I know tomorrow brings with it....

reality.

but every so often it is sure nice to escape from it.

Perhaps literally inside a giant orange jump house pumpkin?!

 so I guess bring on tomorrow...

reality ain't got nothin' on this 

So whether you 're out camping with your kids,

jumping full pocket book into Hoopla,

hitting up the knock off,

just don't miss it

because days like today

are rare gifts

mixed in among the more common days 

filled with homework, tantrums, parent teacher conferences, mom guilt,

work, stress, wishing for silence, begging for silence,  

worry, running to and fro, go go go. 

...and think about what you want...really want. 

not what you're afraid you'll miss

because I sit here tonight feeling blessed that I didn't end up letting that drive 

our direction today.

everyday kinda beautiful

"Some people feel the rain. Others just get wet." -Bob Marley

I had nothing to do with this happening,

as it was already in progress when I arrived home.

 It was one of those days.

Not bad.

Not good.

Just exhausting.

I told the kids my brain was tired today. 

This.

This was a gift.

Given at the right time

on the right day.

A reminder to stop thinking, worrying, and doing for a split second

and just be present.

It's the everyday kind of beautiful that can be quietly missed. 

When my brain is tired it is hard to feel the rain.

I (as do all mom's) do so much for our kids and families that goes 

un-noted, unnoticed, un-thanked.

These moments

Like today

 These are the moments where they do so much for me 

and I am thankful I didn't miss it. That I didn't let the moment go

 un-noted, unnoticed, un-thanked.