Wednesday, May 1, 2013

May Day...Really?!


There’s just something about  May Day....
which we celebrated a day early with the predicted freezing temps and snow!
Nothing a little label slapped on the wrapping couldn't explain:
"Happy May Day!
We are celebrating a day early as the weather will have
us screaming MAY DAY tomorrow!"
                     
 
 
 

Thanks to my sister Linda, we resurrected May Day about 5 years ago at our house.
 
I recall our first go around….Cohen more of a toddler than a boy…Kadence in the stroller. We were far from stealthy to say the least as there are only so many places to hide with a stroller and a toddler whose legs only run so fast!

 

 
Oh how times have changed!
 
 

We have stealth now.
Benson will be trained.
Game on.
 
Why love May Day?
The lack of hype for one!
Less hype brings less expectations which just opens the door for pure simple fun!
 

And

 
Its one opportunity to give to others
with no expectation of something in return
and in society today
 
Those opportunities are rare
 
Its one opportunity to do for others with no recognition
That’s the premise..leave a treat and don’t get caught…
And in society today those opportunities are even rarer.
 

And

 

Its one opportunity that makes me 100% present.
Again seems those opportunities are rare too...
 
We love it!
*so much so that when I realized last week that Cohen should have baseball practice on May Day and told him about the predicament...his response: "well we will just have to skip practice"
that's my boy!
....and the weather, SNOW, canceled practice and moved May Day up one day for us here, so no need to ditch out on baseball practice for May day! Whew!
 
Happy May Day!
*despite the winter weather advisory that is scrolling across the tv right now!

 

 

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

I can't sleep

To do this "the drop off" once is heart breaking.....
to do it twice is....
indescribable. 

What is asked of me tomorrow, will take every ounce of me.

I will hand my baby to a stranger
and walk away.
Walk away with blind trust that she will not only feed and change him,
but cuddle him
smile at him,
sooth him,
love him.......

and I don't know if I can do it.

I really don't know.

I first said here that the pick up is the unspoken worse  but I fear tomorrow the
drop off is gonna be rough.

She is a stranger to my baby.
She is a stranger to...me.

So stop telling me "it will be fine."
You don't know that.
Stop telling me "it will work out."
because we won't know that...
until it's either working out or too late,
At the expense of an innocent soul without a voice.

My classic coping mechanism has kicked in...
don't go to bed
because that only means tomorrow will come.

...eventually I will have to succumb to the night and I will sleep with Benson's blanket
(as I did with the other kids but didn't admit out loud) so he can have the safety
and security of our familiar scent and bond for as long as possible tomorrow....

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

The Question of the Day

The question of the day yesterday and today is:
How did drop off go?
 
The hype is for the drop off....
but the unspoken worst is the pick up.
The pick up you ask ...
Yup because you whisk them up...
Snuggle them close.....
Slowly Breath them in.....
 and.....
they smell like someone else.
And your heart breaks.
 
So to answer your question.
The drop off went great.